“The physical aspect of our disease is the compulsive use of drugs; the inability to stop using once we have started.  The mental aspect of our disease is the obsession, or overpowering desire to use, even when we are destroying our lives.  The spiritual part of our disease is our total self-centeredness.” (NA Basic Text, p. 20).

Addiction is a progressive condition whose symptoms include tolerance, preoccupation, withdrawal, self-deception (denial), loss of control, and distortion of attention.  Without intentionally setting out to lose control, addicts become attached to the pleasure brought by certain behaviors, certain chemicals, certain people to the extent that even when we are not receiving the same level of pleasure, we don’t recognize it.

Another definition of addiction is a state of compulsion, obsession, or preoccupation that enslaves a person’s will and desire.  Our will and desire become attached to specific behaviors, chemicals, objects, or people.  Attachment, then, is the process that enslaves desire and creates the state of addiction.  This attachment can be so strong that we lose sight of our dreams and desires and end up violating our own values, acting against our own will, seeking the pleasure to which we have become attached.

“The relationship between attachment and addiction is not as simple as it might sound.  The brain never completely forgets its old attachments, so the absence of conscious desire does not necessarily mean attachment is gone.  In fact, because of the tricks our minds play on us, many of our addictions are able to exist for years completely outside our awareness; it is only when our addictions are frustrated or cause us conflict that we have an opportunity to notice how attached we truly are.” (Gerald May, MD; Addiction and Grace, p.25)

Dr. May goes on to state, “The loss of attachment is the loss of something very real; it is physical.  We will resist this loss as long as we possibly can. When withdrawal does happen, it will hurt.  And, after it is over, we will mourn.  Only then, when we have completed the grieving over our lost attachment, will we breathe the fresh air of freedom with appreciation and gratitude.” (Addiction and Grace, p.96)

If attachment, then, is the process through which desire becomes enslaved and addictions are created, then detachment describes the opposite process, the liberation of desire.  It describes not freedom from desire, but freedom of desire.  Detachment is a word that is widely misunderstood, often associated with hostile withdrawal, removal of love and concern, and a severing of relationships.  It is most often associated with codependency recovery, where many misinterpret it as abandonment when, in fact, detachment uncovers our basic desire and need for God as we detach from the illusion of control.

Movement from attachment to detachment is a difficult and often painful process and we will need God’s grace to see us through.  Grace empowers us to choose rightly but it does not determine that choice.  It usually requires leaps of faith.

Dr. May says this:
“Ironically, freedom becomes most pure when our addictions have so confused and defeated us that we sense no choice left at all.  Here, where we feel absolutely powerless, we have the most real power.  Nothing is left in us to force us to choose one way or another.  Our choice, then, is a true act of faith.  We may put our faith in ourselves or in our attachments or in God.  It is that simple.” (Addiction and Grace, p.127)