The Jig-saw Puzzle of Life
Published: February 28, 2023
By badmin

The Analogy 

Let me start by saying that I am no puzzle expert. In my limited experience, I have learned that there is a process to successfully completing a jig-saw puzzle. First, identify all the border pieces – the ones with straight edges – and construct the border of the puzzle. This creates the boundaries within which the other pieces must fit.

Next, add in the remaining pieces – working from the outside-in. Often, because we have a picture of the finished puzzle on the box it came in, we have some idea of what it is supposed to look like. We are guided by both color and shape. For instance, if our puzzle is a landscape there may be some pieces that are probably an orange sunset, others that may be green leaves on a tree, and some others that are more likely brown soil or possibly blue ocean.

Putting the Pieces Together

We are more likely to be successful in completing the puzzle by working from some type of system, some organization of the pieces, than by randomly trying to fit pieces without any kind of a plan.

Completing a jig-saw puzzle requires not only some sense of organization but also a large dose of patience. As you make progress, what may have initially seemed overwhelming (picture a 1,000-piece puzzle) becomes more possible. As you get closer to completion, you feel hopeful and even excited. You have learned to not give up. The successful completion gives you a sense of accomplishment.

Seeing the Bigger Picture

A jig-saw puzzle is a good picture of life and life in recovery. A successful life requires firm boundaries. We are usually lacking boundaries when we first begin our recovery. These boundaries are our own moral values, our sense of right and wrong. Often in our addiction we have lost sight of these things. It is the establishment of these boundaries that will form the limits to help keep us on course.

The remaining pieces of the puzzle are the people, places, and things – the experiences of our lives. We learn by trial and error which ones fit and which ones do not. We need to learn what person might fit as a sponsor, what 12-Step meeting is a good fit, etc. We probably learn that we have difficulty fitting in without alcohol or other drugs. Successful people go through this trial and error process within the boundaries of their own moral values. These values help us determine what fits and what doesn’t.

The Puzzle of Life and God’s Role in Recovery

Thinking about a puzzle caused me to think about God’s role in recovery. He has given us boundaries within which we can operate successfully and be blessed. He has given us the Holy Spirit to learn what fits and what doesn’t. He has given us hope to sustain us through to completion. He has forgiven us when we have tried to fit pieces that do not fit. He has given us a picture of the finished puzzle. And He never allows us the horrible experience of getting to the end with one piece missing. That is because He is the missing piece.

Spiritual growth is an essential piece of successful recovery.

There are many paths to spiritual growth but all require some examination and possible change of our original belief system.  The two biggest influences on our belief system are our family of origin and our culture.  To begin to change aspects of our beliefs that are no longer beneficial, we must intervene on any side of the triangle pictured above.  It is usually easiest to intervene on our CHOICES.  It is pretty obvious that when we begin to make different choices, we will have different experiences, which will begin to reshape our beliefs.

What are Beliefs?

In the old Anglo Saxon usage of the word “belief”, be = by and lief = life.  So “belief” is actually “by life.”  What one lives demonstrates one’s belief.  People claim a certain belief, and I ask, “How do you live that?”  If you change how you live by making different choices, you will naturally have different experiences, and these experiences change your beliefs.

Does this happen overnight? Certainly not.  There are 4 stages to spiritual growth:

    1. Unquestioning acceptance – usually the beliefs from our family of origin or sometimes adopted in response to strong cultural influences or charismatic leaders.
    2. Questioning/non-acceptance – often occurs during adolescence, sometimes in college or when presented with new evidence.
    3. Experience of mystery – this occurs when we come up against questions with no answers.
    4. Certainty of beliefs – when either our experience confirms beyond doubt or when we accept a truth based on faith.

How to Explore Spiritual Growth

A useful tool to explore our own spiritual growth is journaling our process, often by asking ourselves questions:

  • In what ways do I wish to change?
  • What is helping me or hindering me from growing?
  • What once seemed true that I now question?
  • What am I doing to enrich myself and grow spiritually?

 

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